It was our first real home as a married couple – if you don’t count the room we had at bible school. The house was built in 1916 and the main floor was all ours. Tucked into a cozy little neighbourhood in Winnipeg we did the best we could to make this suite a home. We didn’t have much money so our furnishings were sparse. A discarded set of kitchen cabinets I found in the alley became our bookshelf. A 5’x5’ piece of carpet I once again found in the alley became our area rug. A borrowed kitchen set, a purchased used sectional. The only new piece of furniture we bought was our bed. We used the two tea chests from our move to Winnipeg as end tables, and used my desk from university as a dresser.
We didn’t have much, but we loved the fact that this was our first home together. We decided we were not going to have a TV. We didn’t want that distraction. So, for the first couple of years in our marriage we didn’t have a TV.
We began working with the youth in the church and I always liked to use movie clips to illustrate the message I was giving. It became a hassle to borrow a TV and VCR each week, so Anne and I began talking about buying a TV and a “video cassette recorder” – that’s what a VCR is for all you young guys out there.
So, I prayed, “Lord, should we get a TV and VCR?”
His answer surprised me.
“What do you want to do?”
What? What do you mean ‘what do I want to do’? I thought it didn’t matter what I wanted? I thought all that mattered is what God wants? Why is the Lord doing asking me what I want? – it’s irrelevant.
Ahhhh, but that is where I was wrong. As I worked through this with the Lord he began to show me that He actually puts desires in our hearts. He puts longings and desires in our hearts that lead us to Him and His purposes in our lives. We cannot shut our hearts down and pay no attention to the desires that reside there.
Sure, we have to be aware that desires can come from 4 places:
However, in an attempt to not be influenced by our flesh, the enemy and the world we have a tendency to totally shut out desire and completely miss what the Lord has put there. We tend to pray, “What should I do Lord?” as opposed to, “What do I want Lord?”.
We need to ask the Lord to help us open up our hearts to see the desires that He has put there and then walk with Him in the outworking of those desires.
The first question Jesus asked as recorded in scripture is found in John 1:38. When two of John’s disciples began to follow behind Jesus he turned to them and asked, “What do you want?”
When blind Bartimaeus was brought to Jesus, He once again asked the same question, “What do you want me to do for you?
Don’t be afraid to take a look into your heart and ask what you really want. Sure, there may be desires in there from the world, your flesh and the enemy, but the Lord can help you discern through those to discover the treasure of the desires He has deposited in you that help lead you to His heart for you and what He wants to do through you.
In discovering what you really want – the desires the Lord has put in your heart – you will discover His heart for you and His heart through you in a way that is a delight to you – it’s what you really want.
So, what do you want?
Psalm 37:4
“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”
Mark 10:51
“’What do you want me to do for you?’ Jesus asked him.”
John 1:38
“’Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, “What do you want?’”